The Catholic church teaches that there are three states of life. They are in order from objective lowest to highest: the married life, the single life, the religious or priestly life. I think you don’t have to be a Catholic, although you may have to be single, to appreciate the legitimacy given to those in the single state.
Now there are a few things to be mentioned here.
While objectively, religious or priestly life is the highest, as it is most focused on the spiritual life, subjectively any of the three could be the best. Just to be clear, objectively means in the abstract not attached to a particular person; subjectively means in the concrete for this or that particular person. I found it difficult for a while that I was not, after all, called to the highest life, prideful creature that I am.
One of the most neglected of these states is the single life, sometimes called single blessedness. It is fine, good and necessary, for at least part of our lives, to be single. If we are not able to feel whole and peaceful as a single person then no doubt we need some more practice and probably shouldn’t be trying to change our state. Nor is it necessarily helpful for people to try to alter our states for us, or keep reminding us about it.
Marriage is sometimes thought of as the easiest without the sacrifices of religious life or the loneliness of the single life. Fairy tales are nice but you had better read the grim originals if you want some reflection of reality. Each of the states has its own difficulties and joys. So make the most of whatever state you are in, the grass is much the same wherever you are, it’s all about the way you eat it.
Katherine Wansink Writes 